Archive for December, 2012


Thursday, December 6th, 2012

Capitalism works better when you are making money off of people you know, and not vast amounts of accounts you can write off as a statistic. This is why I think capitalism worked better pre 80’s financial revolution. It is harder to fuck somebody over when you have to look them in the eye.

Why Do I Like Apple Pears?

Thursday, December 6th, 2012

This is what I’m currently wracking against.

Existence is too damn arbitrary. I want so many things to have meaning, and ultimately, I can’t justify subscribing any thematic arc to them!

I can find no anchor! And now I realize why people need to have imaginary anchors and remain blind to the fact that their coordinates are actually changing, and I can forgive them, because the ocean is a scary, scary place, and drifting from one unknown sea to another, from one unknown sky to another, without having any way of ever retracing your steps — well, that’s not very pleasant.

So many questions.

I’ve wondered this before, and now, in greater confusion:

Why was I born to my respective set of parents?

Why did this sperm, out of all of them, win the race, bestowing upon me my current set of genetics?

Why am I Chinese, and not Nigerian, Brazilian, Russian, or Samoan?

Why was I born in America?

My elementary school “friends” — why did I have to meet them, initiating my inexorable descent into dorkdom?

What deep-seated despair and insecurities prompted my bullies to be assholes?

Why the fuck did I waste my time on stupid shit in high school?

Why did I think that staying up and not sleeping was a good idea?

Why did I hate exercise for so many years?

Why was I so lazy?

Why did I have to choose to live in that godawful dorm?

Why do I like apple pears?

Why do I question?

Makes adopting the philosophy of living in the present that much more challenging, this human desire to question and regret.

The Best Things I’ve Read This Week

Wednesday, December 5th, 2012

The Art of Being Still” — a treatise on writing from the New York Times.

And then, a person on Reddit comes up with a brilliant response about how to be a better person, how to be a better version of yourself. For once, the answer isn’t of the “JUST STOP GIVING A FUCK DAWG” or thinly disguised, self-complimenting you-gotta-be-like-me flavor.